Talking body positivity with stylist Stevie B...
I’ve known Stevie for a long time, she’s actually one of my oldest friends. We’ve been in each others lives for all the big moments: bar mitzvahs, births, weddings, deaths. We’ve grown up together, not just as friends in the same town, but also in the fashion industry. We’ve been to countless fashion weeks together, both worked for high street brands and both carved out our own little niche - Stevie is a brilliant stylist, helping women all over the UK feel amazing about themselves.
But Stevie has had her own struggles. Body image. Her story reminds me so much of that age-old phrase mama Rupaul has coined:
If you can’t love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?
Stevie has been on one heck of a journey with her body. She’s gone from thinking she loves the smaller her, the ‘I must be thin to fit in’ her (involving some rather bizarre diets - I remember she used to chew her food about 3,298 times before swallowing???), to actually loving the NATURAL her. The her that means no restricting, no fad diets, just living with her body.
And what a gorgeous, beautiful body. You simply MUST go and follow her on Instagram - @steviebstylefashion. She talks very openly and honestly about her new found love for her body. She explains it much better than me, but I did get the chance to get some amazing soundbites from Stevie all about her self love journey…
My 'lightbulb' moment of realisation that life isn't just about dieting and worrying about my body was…
whilst working with a coach, Sally, @womenwithsparkle. We really dug deep and questions came up, like: What would it be like to stop weighing yourself? I thought: ‘Impossible!’, but then I read @bodyposipanda‘s book and it changed EVERYTHING!
This is the defining picture of me that makes me look back and know I never want to go back there…
We were living in a hotel at the time and it was stressful. I was so thrilled how skinny I was from it. I shook, I felt faint. I just kept thinking about the wedding in LA I was going to where Alexa Chung was a guest at, and I needed to be thin. Writing that sentence goes against everything I feel in my soul right now. It actually made me feel nauseous writing it. I’m so proud and relieved I’ve done a 180. I feel nothing but sadness looking at this picture. A lost, obsessed woman, forcing herself to be something she isn’t naturally meant to be.
The biggest change I have made to my life to ensure I don't fall back into bad habits…
is ending any self negative talk to my self in the mirror. It has been so powerful that I now actually like my cellulite.
I can really see a huge change in the industry regarding being the ‘perfect’ size’.
Today I saw H&M post on Instagram a girl in a bikini with some beautiful back rolls and stretch marks. It was SO refreshing to see. The more images and campaigns we see like this the better it is for all of us, and our body acceptance journeys.
I’m so thrilled that I’m at a place now that I feel fully relaxed and confident around the kids with my body.
They can prod my cellulite and touch my stretch marks. I used to feel ashamed of those parts of my body and I would be devastated if my kids felt that way. I can tell my seven year old daughter in particular is picking up some healthy body habits which brings me so much joy!
My top three ways to love your body:
1. Follow accounts on social media which represent your body type. Unfollow any accounts that make you feel like shit and have unattainable goals.
2. Try being kinder to yourself in front of the mirror and practice some positive mirror work. Buy the book ‘Mirror Work’ by Louise Hay immediately!
3. Be proud to take up space. Try and realise that forcing ourselves smaller does not equate to happiness. All bodies are beautiful.
